You can’t pour from an empty cup.

Burnout. Something that we’ve all heard of and I’m sure many of us have experienced. So often, burnout is thought to be linked to chronic work-related stress and that can be true. But, what I’m currently experiencing is emotional burnout. I wanted to talk about it as it’s important to recognize that it can exist and show up for many different reasons. Not all related to occupational burnout. 

Imagine you were on a water based inflatable obstacle course. You’re doing really well, challenging yourself and succeeding at the hurdles laid out in front of you, until you take a stumble. You fall off and into the water. Now, you must pick yourself back up and start again and that’s ok, because at this point you are feeling motivated and resilient. And you repeat this, trying so hard to complete the course but now, you keep getting knocked off at different points. Each time you fall, the harder it gets to get back up and not to slip off because now everything around you is wet! The longer this goes on, the less enthusiastic you feel. You’re tired, overwhelmed and losing interest in what once felt like so much fun.  

That’s exactly how I feel. For about eight months, I have experienced prolonged and excessive stress. I have been in this cycle of slipping off the obstacle course and getting hit by unexpected emotional battles. I am very self-aware. I have done a lot of work on myself and on my mental health over the years which has resulted in many lifestyle habits, tools and techniques that I use daily to look after my wellness. But, nobody is unsusceptible from struggling with mental ill health. Even when we prioritize it.  Sometimes, things happen to us. Things that are out of our control and things we couldn’t possibly predict. New things and new challenges that we may not be equipped for. When these happen consecutively and with vigorous intent, over and over again we may find ourselves burnt out, emotionally. That’s what happened to me. 

I rarely get sick. Ordinarily, I sleep well, I eat a balanced diet and I exercise. I have a good daily routine and outlets to help me relieve stress. I socialize and do things that bring me joy. I do all the things I “should” do to keep myself healthy. But, I have still been struggling. I wasn’t recognizing burnout and so, my body decided to hit me with sickness. A reality check. What I needed was rest. I neglected this to the point where my body forced me to stop, slow down and recharge. My cup has been completely depleted. I’ve reached emotional capacity. I have felt exhausted, overwhelmed, drained, irritable, and anxious. I’ve had low motivation and have been feeling insecure and incapable. Instead of allowing myself space to feel those things and to work through them, I just kept going. Pushing through and trying to continue with my everyday life without acknowledging that it’s hard to maintain your routines when you are also trying to manage a variety of storms.  

Even though it’s been hard, I have been trying to focus on my coping mechanisms to care for myself. One of the most beneficial things I find that helps with my mental health is being in nature. I love running outdoors, walking through the welsh hills and surrounding myself with animals and trees. I love to keep active and exercising and where possible, I will do this outside but I also go to the gym and follow a strength training plan which keeps me focused, routine and motivated. Another vice I have is cooking. Making a delicious meal or a tasty baked good is something I find therapeutic, particularly if I have a podcast or music on whilst I’m doing it. 

If you are struggling with emotional challenges, take the time to allow yourself to feel that struggle. It’s ok to feel. It’s ok to experience intense emotions. It’s ok to admit that you’re finding things hard and it’s ok to take a break. My body forced me into having a time out but, I’m taking this as a lesson. Time to reflect and understand why I am feeling this way. Time to process my emotions and treat myself with care.  

There may be times in life, where we cannot control what happens to us or what challenges we face. But we can choose how we look after ourselves during those times. Rest is something I will prioritize going forward. I will put my feet up, switch off and sleep a little longer when I need it and I will do that guilt free. There is nothing more important, than your health and wellbeing. Something I have noticed over recent years is that mental and physical health are linked. You cannot neglect one of those things without it impacting the other. At least, that’s my experience. Remember, you cannot give to others and take care of others, if you have nothing left to give.