Helping someone in a mental health crisis

I remember the night vividly. It was 3am and I received a message someone who I knew had been struggling for a while. The message was short, but I could sense the desperation in his words. He was not in a good place and needed someone to talk to.

I knew that I had to act fast, so we exchanged a few messages back and forth to get a sense of the situation. It quickly became clear to me that he was on the verge of ending his life. I knew that I had to get up, get out, and go see him in person. I arrived at his house shortly after, feeling a mix of anxiety and determination. I knew that I had to be strong for him and provide the support that he needed. When I saw him, I could tell that he was not in a good place. He was in tears, but relieved to see me. We spent a long time talking and listening to each other. I knew that I had to tread carefully, but also make sure that he knew he was not alone.

We talked through his feelings, and I encouraged him to seek professional help. Together, we made a plan of action. The waiting list for counselling was long, so we kept revisiting his goals and slowly but surely, he began to see the light. He went to see his GP and we booked counselling sessions for him.

Over the next few months, I watched as he began to make progress. It wasn't easy, but he was determined to become the person he longed to be.

Here are some suggested coping mechanisms that you can adopt if you ever find yourself struggling to make progress towards becoming the person you long to be:

1. Set Realistic Goals: It's important to set achievable goals, so start with small and realistic ones. This way, you can build momentum and increase your confidence as you make progress.
2. Practice Self-Care: Taking care of yourself is crucial for your mental and emotional wellbeing. This includes eating healthy foods, exercising regularly, getting enough sleep and doing things that make you happy.
3. Reach Out for Help: It's okay to ask for help when you need it. Whether it's from a friend, family member, or mental health professional. Seeking support can make a huge difference.
4. Challenge Negative Thoughts: Negative thoughts can hold you back, so try to identify them and challenge them. Ask yourself if they are based in reality and if they are helpful or harmful.
5. Practice Mindfulness: Mindfulness is a technique that can help you stay focused on the present moment. It involves paying attention to your thoughts, feelings and sensations without judgment.
6. Build a Support System: Having a support system can make a huge difference when you are struggling. This can include friends, family members and support groups.
7. Learn from Setbacks: Setbacks are a natural part of the journey towards personal growth. Instead of giving up, use setbacks as an opportunity to learn and grow.

Remember, making progress towards becoming the person you long to be is a journey, and it's important to be patient with yourself along the way.

Today, six months later, he's doing well. He still has his moments, but he knows where he wants to go and that he's not alone. It's amazing to see how far he's come and how much he's grown. I'm proud to have been there for him when he needed me most, and grateful that he trusted me enough to reach out for help. It's so important for friends, family, and loved ones to know how to reach out and offer support to those who may be struggling.

Here are some tips on how to start that conversation and end the stigma around mental health: 

1. Normalize the Conversation: Start by normalizing the conversation around mental health. Let your loved ones know that it's okay to talk about their struggles and that they are not alone. Share your own experiences and encourage them to do the same. But don’t make it about you, after all, we are not all the same and we don’t all deal with things in the same way. 
2. Show Empathy: Show empathy towards your loved one's struggles. Try to understand their perspective and validate their feelings.
3. Offer Support: Offer support in any way that you can. This could be as simple as listening without judgment or helping them find resources and professional help. 
4. Educate Yourself: Educate yourself on mental health and the resources available. This will help you better understand what they are going through and how to support them.
5. Watch for Warning Signs: Be aware of warning signs that someone may be struggling. This could include changes in mood, behaviour or habits.
6. Encourage Professional Help: Encourage professional help if needed. Offer to help them contact GP and support them on their journey towards achieving better mental health.

It's a reminder that sometimes, all we need is someone to listen, to understand, and to be there for us.