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Relationships and My Bipolar Disorder

written by Natasha Davies-Hopton 23/05/2017

Hello there fellow mental health warriors! I hope this finds everyone getting through their own day good and well. I've decided to write a (short?) blog about how I find having something that most people may not really think about, relationships.

Both romantic and platonic relationships are sometimes difficult for me to maintain. The friends I have now are, mostly, the ones who have seen my worst days and decided to stick around (thanks). My romantic relations sometimes do not end as well (lol!).

My bipolar disorder (I also suffer with depression and anxiety) manifests itself in, among other ways, a very black and white outlook. My depression also means I isolate myself when I'm feeling the curse of 'the black dog' as some call it. During my very anxious times, I am loud and impulsive. These things combine make it sometimes hard to be my friend (so to my friends once again, thanks).

"Friends are definitely a 'quality over quantity' kind of thing."

In both platonic and romantic relationships I sway from being needy in the sense that something bad has happened to the other half if they take 'too long' to text back, or wanting to be with them all the time, all the way to being very withdrawn emotionally and not wanting to text the other half back, or wanting to have more alone time. During anxious phases, I want to go out more often. I'm prone to putting my foot in my mouth in sometimes epic proportions and I get bored very easily i.e. I can't or find it very difficult to sit through a film or read a book (although this isn't all bad as I try to use it to my advantage these days and get practical stuff done which I've put off and it means I'm more sociable).

Working relationships can be more difficult to deal with as I am instantly more closed off with new people. Distinguishing colleagues from friends or acquaintances is still difficult and confusing for me when I start a new job or I am in an unusual/unfamiliar situation.

All of this can lead to being a person who has a smaller circle of true friends. Like me. There is nothing wrong with this. Friends are definitely a 'quality over quantity' kind of thing.


Natasha

#TimeToChange #EducateNotDiscriminate #TimeToChangeWales #EndTheStigma #InYourCorner

If you would like to write a blog post about your experiences of stigma or related issues, email info@timetochangewales.org.uk

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