I have depression. When people ask me what would make me happy I get a little annoyed.
A wave of a magic wand to provide me with something would make it all better. Probably not.
I can be happy. I can be sad or scared, loving, tender, exhilarated or joyous, just like everyone else.
When did I become a problem and stop being a person?
I'm not 'broken'. I don't need 'fixing'. I need to be treated like a human being because that's what I am. I may have a condition but I am not the condition.
The Japanese have a craft known as Kintsukuroi. They embellish the damage of cracks in pottery by filling them with gold. There is a belief that when something has suffered damage and has history it becomes more beautiful. They add something precious to help reform the object, by its very nature adding value to the original.
Instead of attempting to return to what was, it provides an opportunity for improvement.
Perhaps we can all learn to embrace people rather than believe we are broken or fixed and to appreciate that flaws can bring out a unique beauty. If we start thinking of ourselves as organic, capable of growth and realise that we need to be nurtured on occasion and we will flourish more at times than others.
What if the 'problem' was not feeling validated, not having worth. What if the 'fix' was simply listening and spending time with them – no project work, just… person to person?
Let's take off the tunnel vision glasses, stop looking at a quick fix, cheat sheet and learn to trust ourselves and each other and treat people, not just conditions, with what they deserve.
You can read more of Stephen’s work on his own blog here.